My Singapore Misadventure, 1979In The Same Boat
Story and website design by Nam Nguyen ©2016 | Photographs by Vincent Leduc ©1979
"A Dream-Like Experience"
While visiting the refugee camp in Buton in the summer of 1979, Vincent Leduc took these powerful photographs which document the living conditions of Vietnamese boat refugees in Indonesia. He later joined Gary Ferguson en route to Singapore in a small wooden boat full of Vietnamese women and children. Unbeknownst to us, this boat is where Vincent’s journey crossed paths with my own.
The existence of these photos came as a complete surprise to me – I don’t even recall seeing a photographer on that boat 34 years ago. Even more astounding about this discovery is that I was in many of the photos Vincent captured, sometimes even looking directly at the camera!
Vincent Leduc's photographs taken in May 1979, with comments from our September 2013's Facebook connection:
Pulau Buton Refugee Camp
My temporary home in Indonesia at a refugee camp in Pulau Buton: The large hut on the far left was built on the muddy beach by my boat owner family, my three cousins and me several days after we arrived in this remote island in late April 1979.
"Nam, I was a young free lance reporter at that time, based in Bangkok. I spent the whole year 79 reporting on refugees from Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. I came down to Singapore with an American friend, Gary Ferguson from Phoenix, he was financially supporting Food for the Hungry. We were supposed to go with the Akuna, but Gary changed his mind, that was in early May 79. The ship had just sent groups of Vietnamese rescued at sea, to the Riau Indonesian islands. In Pulau Buton. They were left alone without help. So we went there Gary and me, we stayed a week, building a school and other facilities to help the community..."
"... When we arrived, there was no organization. Every family or "boat" was by itself. Gary patronized an organization. He put all family chiefs together and got elected a kind of council. From there, people where volunteer or chosen for specific areas: health, school, sports, administration, and so on. Then he bought tools and material. We built the school, a sewage system, a volley ball area, and even public toilets, for they were none before."
"When we arrived the first day, the first thing we did was to seat down with the boat people around the tape recorder. We had a message, very long (between 30 to 60 minutes long) recorded in Singapore few days earlier by Jimmy at their attention. He was speaking in Vietnamese on the tape. He talks directly to the people, some of them by their name. One of the boat rescued was sinking when the Akuna came. On approach, Jimmy was always talking with the boat people with a loudspeaker, in Vietnamese, to comfort them. He was considered as their savior, especially by those from this sinking boat. They had even changed their own name by adding "Jimmy" to it. In this scene you can feel a deep attention, even fascination, both because a voice is coming from the machine (your impression as a child and for those who were unfamiliar with that technology) but mainly because it is Jimmy talking. Jimmy is also introducing Gary and me. He explains the purpose of our visit and talks of us as brothers."
"Well, he may have been thinking that he could move mountains by himself. He contacted Food for the Hungry, took a plane and came right in the middle of dramatic SEA. I met him in Bangkok. I was a young free lance reporter with already four years experience there. I was in Laos during six month between expulsion of Americans to my expulsion after declaration of the Popular Democratic Republic of Laos. I was following the refugee question since, from Thailand, on Lao and Khmer border. Well, he said that he was going to finance Food for the hungry and that he wanted to see their programs first. And he proposed me to come along. There was the Akuna among the programs and he was very interested to go at sea in order to witness boat people rescue. So I followed him..."
"... Then Gary had the idea to try to go to Singapore with one of the small boat from Vietnam. He believed that being American, he could convince the American ambassador to accept the people he would brought. 62 people came along..."
"So this family on the boat was not taking part in that community organization. Gary tried to talk with them many times. But they were still hoping to leave somehow to a better country than Pulau Buton. This is how the idea came to Gary's mind. How to help them too ? Now Gary was not coming from heaven but from Arizona. He had few knowledge of the general situation in SEA, it was his first time in this part of the world. A month earlier he was watching TV in his nice home with swimming pool in Phoenix. Gary was a successful businessman, retired at 35 or 38 years old. He saw the report about boat people in TV. And he suddenly decided that he HAD to do something. Not only send money, but do something face to face..."
"I remember that the idea came to Gary because the family who came from Vietnam with that boat did not want to leave it. They where staying on board, refusing to get down to land. At that time, as you know very well, the conditions in the "camp" where rude. They where thinking of continuing their journey, even toward Australia. After few days talking with them, Gary said he could try the Singapore option..."
"... after talking many times with the family who did not want to land, Gary said he would try to get them accepted by the US in Singapore. They accepted. The word went accross the whole camp and I remember very well how dramatic it has been for everyone, because everyone was facing a hard decision: to go and try this chance, or not. Now, the boat was strong, the distance short, the sea quiet. And Gary was confident in himself. Was he a fool? No. Naive, probably. Or blinded by hope. We all choose at some point to believe in hope instead of reason, to credit humanity instead of inhumanity. That why Gary left Phoenix AZ to come to Pulau Buton. Well, you know the end of the story..."
In The Same Boat
"Vincent, you just told the real story in details about the heart-breaking state being of many people, including me, when we had to make the decision, to trust Gary or not, to believe in him and luck or not, to take chance in the sea again or not to risk our lives again or not... I have many personal details but I can not write in words at the moment. Thanks so much for your generosity again Vincent Leduc. You truly speak/write from the heart and you tell my story as well ..."
"That's me wearing the very same tee shirt with horizontal stripes that I wore in photographs with my brothers in Saigon before I left them behind for the boat journey. It was my only tee shirt for months during my stay in Buton refugee camp in Indonesia.
"BTW, I had no idea there was a photographer on board, although in this photo I was staring at the camera. My mind wasn't normal or something because I don't even remember all these boys and little children on the boat. I really enjoy looking at the expressions of each boy in this photo now each time I look at it. Again, great photojournalism job Mr. Vincent Leduc!"
"34 years later, looking at these photographs of me reassured that my thoughts and feelings about this significant event and experience were always accurate. That I was always alone."
"OMG! Vincent, I was too on that boat with Gary that the Singaporean navy ship pulled us out back to sea. I even wrote a post on my Facebook ..."
"... We were two days at sea, stopped by the Singapore navy. Gary could not succeed. We came back to Pulau Buton. Then both of us were arrested by the Indonesian police and expelled from Indonesia..."
"I remember I prayed so hard for Gary to help us."
"I remember very well that observation plane flying over us and later on the Singapore navy ship coming to stop us. Gary went on it. He stayed two or three hours while we were waiting in hope. He succeeded to convince the ship captain to call the American ambassador and he talked a long time with the ambassador on the phone trying to push him to accept the group on board. And he was so disappointed to come back with the "no" answer. Everybody was saddened at the moment. I can understand your words "It was the most stupid and embarrassing time in my whole life."
"I don't remember eating or drinking during this 3-4 days journey at all. I was too depress to be hungry -- about not being able to go into Singapore. I was hoping for another option, any options other than going back to Buton Camp."
"After Gary's fail attempt to get our boat to enter Singapore, I felt let down and very depressed. I had a very difficult time returning to the camp. The night of of return to Buton, I couldn't sleep. I didn't know if if I could face my cousins, the boat owner and his family. I wanted to jump to the dark ocean. I felt guilty and embarrassed..."
"I am retrospectively sad. I remember how everyone on board was so disappointed on the return. Including Gary. I am sad for what happened to Nam. I learned it now, I ignored it at that time. This is the proof that we never know everything, it is a good lesson for a journalist as well as for any body who believe that he knows something for sure, that he knows the Truth. There is no Truth. Only truth."
"I had my own reason at the time to leave my cousins and the boat owner family behind at Buton camp and sneak out that night alone. It was a long story..."
Gary Ferguson returns to Buton Camp after the unsuccessful Singapore journey with the boat people.
"... these are the men that flocked to the boat on our return to Buton. The people that are still on board in these photos are the original people on this boat and they were not allowed to get off. I think those of us including Gary and you (the angle of this photo) and a few others from Buton camp already get off and back to the camp."
"... the man in short standing in the water on the right looked like my cousin, he was several years older and much bigger than me... As the boat landed on the mud and water of Buton beach, I saw my cousin flocked toward the boat. He came close to me and reached out his arms. I jumped to him thinking that he was helping me get off the boat. Instead, I was showered with punches in my face and all over my body. He held me under the water as I struggled to get up. It was the best thing that happened to me at that moment. I cried and ran back to our hut. I remember no one ever asked me why I ran away on this boat with Gary, the American cowboy.
My cousin did a huge favor for me that day. He took away all the tensions and guilt feelings I carried on the boat ride. The cry was helpful and I remember I slept a long sleep afterward."
"Nam, I was deeply touched by the tale of your misadventure when we came back. I understand it is touching something very personal. You did not only went through a boat people journey but also a journey into life, alone. I see how deep the remains and the reminds can be. Also this I believe this process on going through the journey to bring back everything to light is essential. It is liberating to recognize and say things by their name. Thanks you for sharing this."
A scar on my right knee from falling into a deep hole with broken glass at Buton Camp still visible 34 years later.
NEXT
Runaway From Refugee Camp
During my junior year in high school in Nebraska in 1984, I wrote an essay for my English class, describing life in the Buton Refugee Camp, and the unforgettable runaway on a boat to Singapore with Gary Ferguson.
Vincent Leduc's Photographs ©1979
"Refugee" by Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers, 1979
My Singapore Misadventure, 1979 | singapore79.com
In TheSameBoat Story and website design byNam Nguyen ©2016 Photographs byVincent Leduc ©1979
Songs about the Refugee Experience
"Sea of Memory
(Biển Nhớ")
- Mỹ Hạnh, 2011
"Sea of Memory
(Biển Nhớ")
- Khánh Ly, 1980s
"Refugee"
- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers, 1979
Photographs by Vincent Leduc ©1979 | Story and Website by Nam Nguyen ©2016
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